This week's Everyday Dilemma is from Anne. Anne says she doesn’t know what to say when people ask her how she is, and she’s NOT O.K.

Anne has chronic physical health issues, and says she still tries to lead as normal a life as possible: caring for her family, working part time, being hospitable, and participating in her local church’s activities. 

However sometimes Anne feels absolutely lousy doing these things but soldiers on nonetheless. She says she smiles and puts on a brave front. When people ask her how she’s going, she doesn’t know whether to tell them the truth, or fob them off with a 'not too bad', or 'fine'. Instead she usually finds herself saying she’s 'okay thanks', which to her means, “I'm feeling absolutely horrible but I'm here and I'm okay.” 

What do you think? Should Anne tell people how she’s really feeling? Or should she not burden people with a heavy answer to what is a common, light question that people ask of each other all the time?

• Do you ever say how you’re really feeling when people ask “how are you?”
• Has the question become such a token comment, that it would be out of place to return it with a genuine response?
• Should the truth, or social nicety, take priority here?